EID

 hari raya is just around the corner, and as the likes of other fellow malaysian  and muslims, the heat is strong day by day. we can see each faces glimmer with smiles and happiness, whether you are a young boy or and old chap, everyone is captivated by the joy of celebrating the festivities.

Remdan will be missed, and hoping that we shall meet the fasting month all over again next year. 

strings re-attached

 time heals

that's a fact , and I think this time, i have to apreciate the oppurtunity to the fullest, and never take it for granted again.

until we see again

adrift

 well, it's taken almost couple of weeks now, and there's a slight progress in the making, but I ain't sure it's in the positive way or vice versa.  still hoping that all the troubles could be managed strategically and the struggle isn't the main concern now.

the difference in view really pays it's due I think. toughen up and repel the unnecessary things. try to remain in calm and analyze any oppurtunity that should be taken, and try to grasp it as tight as I could, so this time there's no doubt about me that can be cried out anymore. any distractions have been terminated, and now all that matters is that I can feel and retouch the vibrant and pure fragrance of the once blooming seed.

still making the climb I think

a decade still young, and many still need to be learned

time heals, and I hope the phrase were true indeed

one step at a time

how do you get back from falling deep down the abysmal black hole?

that's a question that still left unanswered, although there's many response that you can get from so called philosopher, fake prophet and the wannabe in the social media platform, seems there's no actual answer that can put the sequence back in it's perspective.

people will show you how they cope with the situation by giving you how they manage to resolve their own shit, and as you can see, each person have their own way of  comeback and that's how we can realize that each one have had their own perspective on their own inner play. the problems may vary and each of them differs depends on the weight, the obstacle and the person who face it. that is why we always heard different solution and different findings while the real question that we heard are just the same.

thus, just start to repair the broken, even it is hard and we always believe that there's a little chance that things will be the same again. every chances matters. we have to gain back the strenght, and try to brave the storm little by little, and keep our feet rooted tightly so we won't flew and drawn to the swirling wind and back once more to that deep hole.

it's a challenge, but it isn't impossible.

...............................................................

heh, it's easier to be said than to be done, but at least it's a progress right?

changes

although you long for something so hard, doesn't mean that it's what you wanted after all.

frankly said, when the time comes, and you get what you aim so eagerly, you'll notice that it actually aren't the same as you predicted, theoretically. something along the way may get caught in time, the changes of an era, and the way our mind works after years of experience gathered by so many obstacle.

we just didn't realize that we aren't the same people we used to be anymore.

but the funny part is, we still get our target with the same dream that we kept for all these years. 

it's just that it doesn't feels right anymore.

something that you long so much before, now just a reminiscence of the past glory unprepared when we actually pass the finish line and strike the goal.

alas, i think i don't deserve to dream no more, just be in time and follow the flow of the so called river called life until i get tired, and grasp anything in the way that i can reach, and try to hold onto it until there's no energy left, and let the stream decide whether this man should float or sunk.

i think that's the decision in this instant. maybe tomorrow the tide will turn, or the book turns to new leaf, who knows. 

for sure, I ain't giving up.

when you went right, but it actually left

mainly, interpretation of some issue that comes but you easily accepted the information based on your own perception. 

why people doesn't take issues and see it from all the perspective given, but seldom tend to choose the reason that suits their belief, I mean you already have your judgement before you scroll down the evidence. so where's the justice?

but, we just can blame it all on prejudice, sometimes the problem that appears solely comes from your own fault, and you had to admit it. But that's the problem ; people tend to make assumption based on your past faultiness, that actually have been ridden mostly entirely. 

our minds work mysteriously, and we as human doesn't always make a true judgement and as always, bias will come into picture. we aren't  robots that can analyze things based on what they were programmed to, and they just see things as simple as 1 and 0. 

yeah, problems do come and go, and technically that's how people can evolve and gain experience, hence we develope ourselves as we try to solve it.

but sometimes, there's problem so deep that you feel that you're hanging by a thread and anytime the steep gorge will consume you , whether you're ready or not. sometimes you feel so hopeless like you just think ending thyself is the solution, and also sometimes you think that all the burden of this world was weighted on your shoulder,even walking seems impossible. 

truely, you only know who you are, it's hopeless to reason with people when they have their own perception on you, and trying to justify is just a waste of time. what's left is just your trust and believe in the Almighty. but we will keep moving on, that's life man. Time will tell, that someday the soothing light at the end of the tunnel comes, and there's paradise awaits.

remembrance

tengah kerja, teringat kepada blog lama.

cuba untuk kembali menulis, namun keazaman sudah tiada

mungkin masa semakin mencemburui kita

apakan daya, hidup ini pelbagai onaknya

fasa berubah, dan kita juga sama

bagaikan arus air, menelusur sifatnya

semakin lama, semakin deras geraknya

menuju ke kuala, berjumpa kali seterusnya

akhirnya lepas bebas ke lautan samudera

dan dihitung pula, di alam yang bukan fana

time

motor cbt aku tu rasanya dah kena full servis/overhaul dah tu. makin teruk dah bunyi enjinnya. tapi seperti biasa, masa+kewangan memang mencemburui.

belum kira fucked up governing agency lagi.

palat sungguh

diam

 setalah bertahun laman ini tidak bersentuh, terasa satu impak kelainan bersarang di minda, dahulu aku lebih kepada bercerita, meluah serta berkongsi apa yang aku rasa,apa yang aku pendam serta apa yang aku fikirkan, namun masa itu satu entiti yang kejam, masa itu ibarat sebuah kereta kebal yang gagah, menghentam dan menghenyak aku sehingga aku tidak mampu melakukan apa-apa. jika dihitung tempoh yang berlalu , sebenarnya banyak yang aku ingin ceritakan, dan banyak yang ingin aku coretkan, tetapi masa itu terlalu suntuk untuk aku berbuat demikian.aku kini lebih kepada menyerap dan hadam segala apa yang terjadi dan secara tidak langsung, aku lebih ke arah mempersetankan segala hal dan mengambil pendirian untuk menjadi kaku dan bertabah walau sekuat mana badai yang menghunus.

dua perkara yang menjadi pengimbang dalam aku menelurusi kehidupan kini adalah persekitaran kerja dan komitmen kepada keluarga. satu bahagian amat aku benci dan satu bahagian adalah sumber kebahagiaan aku. aku cuma perlu untuk melaras titik pertemuan antara dua perkara ini agar kewarasan aku masih di paras normal dan tidak mula berdamping ke arah kemusnahan.

"selagi hayat dikandung badan, budi yang baik dikenang jua"

cukup aku tutup di sini dahulu buat masa sekarang. fikiran aku berkecamuk,menerobos ruang untuk diluah namun tersekat sekat.mungkin hasil diam berkali musim. insyaallah aku cuba untuk tulis lagi pada masa akan datang.

aku cuba

72 seasons of sorrow

-alfer-

global threat: death is in the air

Tahun 2020, sepatutnya adalah satu tahun di mana kereta sudah mulai terbang, rakyat Malaysia sudah maju , Politikus yang korup sudah tidak wujud dan cerita Back To The Future boleh dilihat sebagai tidak relevan lagi. Namun, semua itu hanya mimpi...bagus juga lah, sebab aku masih boleh berimaginasi dengan cerita trilogi tadi.

Cuma apa yang menjadi satu realiti adalah satu pandemik.. diulang, PANDEMIK yang melanda bukan sahaja negara berdaulat Malaysia, namun seluruh dunia. 

CORONA VIRUS DISEASE 2019 atau nama yang lebih mudah disebut dan dihafal oleh anak-anak aku iaitu Covid-19. Tapi sebab aku power, aku tulis C19 sahaja bagi menjimatkan masa dan lenguh jari menaip, walaupun sesungguhnya banyak sudah marhaen merujuk wabak ini sebagai C19, tapi aku gila publisiti, aku acah-acah seperti aku yang mula. pebende aku mengarut ni.

Aku tak bercadang untuk bercerita berkenaan wabak ini, sebab seantero pelusuk dunia dari Kepulauan Galapagos terus ke Srivijaya membawa ke Segenting Kra memperkatakan berkenaan pandemik ini. aku cuma nak mengaitkan perkara ini dengan pandemik yang agak popular dan cult, nampak mengarut namun kebarangkalian untuk terjadi itu ada : Zombie Apocalypse.

Buat mereka yang masih tertanya-tanya ape kejadah zombie apocalypse ni, mari sini saya terangkan.
"Zombie Apocalypse is a collapses of civilization due to swarms of zombies overwhelming social, law-enforcement, and military structures. Typically, only a few individuals or small bands of survivors are left of the living". Penerangan secara ringkas maksud berkenaan, dan dapat aku kaitkan dengan situasi semasa di mana pandemik yang melanda adalah secara global dan total, dan merebaknya pandemik ini adalah senyap dan pantas,sepantas ben johnson namun dikalahkan jua oleh michiko.Cuma yang masih membuatkan kita menarik nafas lega adalah bilangan manusia yang sihat masih lagi ramai, terima kasih di atas kepantasan petugas-petugas kesihatan dan pihak berkuasa yang berhempas pulas untuk membendung pandemik ini.

Imaginasi aku membayangkan bahawa sistem yang mendokong manusia akan lumpuh,semua dark side manusia akan mula timbul di mana untuk survive, kebinatangan akan melebihi kewarasan fikiran (walaupun sifat kebinatangan itu adalah lebih baik jika dibandingkan sifat kemanusiaan yang hanya berbunyi sedap tetapi penuh kejijikan).manusia mula menjadi selfish, huru hara akan melanda, munculnya manusia manusia yang akan mengaku sebagai penyelamat (messiah) , dan manusia juga akan mula mencari puak-puak tersendiri dan bergaduh sesama clan masing masing. Pada masa itu , yang masih hidup berharap mati adalah jalan penyelesaian. pergh! imaginasi macam gampang, hahaha

among the best zombie flick for me, the zombies were quite 'friendly', but the story was sooo entertaining,british style

Kalau nak cerita panjang lebar pasal zombie ni memang banyak la nak dibincangkan, namun seperti aku tulis kat atas, bagi menjimatkan masa dan aku sudah mula lenguh menekan papan kekunci ni, jadi serba sedikit sudah aku dah terangkan, tapi jangan ambil serius sangat la apa aku tulis ni, ini cuma pandangan peribadi aku yang banyak terpengaruh dengan filem genre zombie ni.kah kah kah

Cuma satu aku suka nak ingatkan. Persamaan antara C19 dengan zombifikasi ini satu : semuanya bermula dari sifat kemanusiaan yang lebih teruk dari kebinatangan.

All Nightmare Long

-alfersyahril-

  

release jgk album metallica yg baru

aku kt malaysia ni kene la tunggu sebulan ....hampeh